Brian, a great poet over at waystationone writes poems in 55 words that are just amazing with imagery. I have been reading them for awhile and have decided to try one.
Thoughts Strangle
Thoughts strangle
in
the middle of
the night.
Tick tock,
Tick tock
clocks telling
of
passing time.
Sleep eludes
as
thoughts strangle.
Thump thump
the heart beats
tight
in the
chest.
Tears shed
in
the quiet dark.
Hurt knows
no
descrimination.
Buzz buzz
the
alarm blares.
Thoughts strangle
in
the dawn.
A new morning smile?
27 Comments and Reactions:
I LOVE IT...I LOVE IT!
That was very well done, it took me right throug the nite.
-->I rely on every day being a new one.
http://www.websavvymom.com/
I like!
I might just give this a try. 55 words seems manageable, not too much of a committment. I haven't written much poetry, so this would be a good place to start.
I had a night just like the one you wrote about.
- G
great 55! thanks for the shout out as well. (blushing, lol) thoughts strangle...and keep you awake and make you want to break that clock. smiles. maybe thats just me...
VL, man a new "morning smile" is when I wake up now and don't find my mother out trying to walk a stuffed doll.
BIG HUGS
Love it.
And girl, go to the second to last page of your GFC and you will FINALLY see my face!!!!!!!!!!
AMEN!!!!!!!!!!! Of course I've been follwing you, but you now FINALLY show up in my reader!!!!!!!!
I love this! There is nothing worse that a sleepless night, and the tick-tock of the clock drives me mad! The hands never seem to move around either!
I always love your poetry!
Beautiful! I can't even answer the question "How are you?" in less than 55 words!
Very good! Kinda stressful though...I hope it isn't like that for you every night!
wow, great poem...your very talented, seriously!
Lovely. Talent abound.
Mary
Great poem - really cool
Kate xx
Very well done. Just 55 words sounds kind of difficult one to do it. You did it and it was just beautiful!
xx
I am going to be thinking about this poem when I have trouble sleeping tonight. It will keep me company as I lay awake.
I like this.
I wish I could write poems.
WOW Laura..this is one of your best. 55 word challenge? You rocked it.
I wouldn't be smiling after a night like that!!
'Thoughts strangle'. That chimes with me at 2 a.m.! Nice poem.
Bedtime
Blimey, that sounds like most of my nights trying to sleep!
I am pretty sure you're the only person I "know" who can make dark sound poetic. I imagine that trying to write poetry in 55 words is a lot like trying to keep blog posts under 500 words. Practically impossible. But well done!!
I really enjoyed that. It described my life, lately!
You've captured that experience perfectly!
Thoughts strangle the dawn...awesome imagery! Happy Saturday to you...
The Saturday Sphinx
That was wonderful, VL, really, really good. I can relate to the sentiments in it too.
Oh that was really really good!
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