My friends son swallowed a quarter. Had to have it removed in the OR.
Silly boy
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

The Quiet Shouts

What's it like to have all the power,
To make my decisions for me.
It certainly wasn't your finest hour,
Yet the blame, it all rests with me.

I say I am sorry, and voice my mind,
But the silence continues to burn.
Never to learn never to find,
Is not the way it should be.

You walk out of the room as soon as I speak,
Never listening to what I say.
It looks as though the future is bleak,
But better than the silence I hear.

You have certainly done this before,
To this I have no doubt.
Shoved the souls out the door,
After letting them in.

As it all dies,
It never works out,
In the eyes,
The quiet shouts.

If you decide your decision is no good,
After pushing away.
You will feel as you should
Alone with your thoughts, so long

Holy Crap Part 2

I told my husband about the money....... he tossed me the electric bill.
I should have known better. ;-)

Holy Crap Free Money

I couldn't help but share this brilliant news, I just received three un-cashed paychecks from work. Apparently when I switched banks a couple of years ago it took several weeks to get the direct deposit sorted. Meanwhile I was issued live checks. Our paycheck statements look just like the live checks and I never opened them. I don't always open them knowing the money is in the bank, so I just file them away. The letter that came with the checks said it was soon to be turned over to the state as unclaimed money and suggested the checks get deposited straight away.

I called the woman listed on the letter just to confirm that this was real and no mistake was made. I thanked her and said what a great job she has.

The amount you wonder, $1500. Cool and vacation almost here. (haven't decided whether to tell the husband or not)

Physicals, NYC Prep and randomness

Just some rambling today. I had a physical this morning and it was mostly good. Blood tests are fine and blood pressure is great, and...... I have lost 10 pounds since I last saw her a couple of months ago. She is also willing to seem me every few months to keep me on track. I am bound to succeed this time.

I watched part 1 of The Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion and was a bit disappointed. There wasn't as much drama as I expected. The promos for part 2 look more promising. I live a boring life, can you tell.

And the "real" phenomenon continues on Bravo with a new show called NYC Prep. It covers a group of uber-rich teens that live in the Upper East side... apparently the place to live. Some of the kids seem more normal than others, which is true anywhere in the world I suppose. A few of them seem to think they are more entitled than the others and they all realize the importance of networking and social status. I suppose if you live like they do it is part of every day life.

There is one set of siblings, a 16 yo girl and an 18 yo boy who live alone in a penthouse while the parents live in the Hamptons. The parents come into town once a week to check on them. That must be a kids dream, a beautiful home in an exciting city, with an unlimited bank account. Where do I sign up, I could use a couple of weeks living like these kids do, minus the SAT exams, acne and school work.

School has finally ended, for the summer, in our town, I thought it never would. My oldest is in college and since they get out so much earlier than high school it seemed even longer. The school year was a long one to begin with since the kids missed weeks due to the ice storm in December of last year and we had a lot of missed days due to snow storms. My youngest even had to go to school on a couple of Saturdays. Surprisingly she didn't seem to mind. Now starts the "I'm bored" "can you drive me to....."

As I have mentioned in previous posts, my daughters and I are going to NYC on holiday. We are only spending a couple of days, but we will make the most of it. I haven't decided if I would like to live in a city that big, but I do like to visit.

Intent

Anger was never my intent,
To the friendship it made a huge dent.

Irreparable so it seems,
Would I heal it by any means?

No-is the answer to that query,
All my fault may be your theory.

Never is anything all one sided,
If you think so, you are very misguided.

All this time no need for blame,
Too late for either to direct that claim.

Forgiveness should always be on the list,
Thrown out into the foggy mist.

Cleaning the air for all to see,
The past is over, let it be.

Blogger's Lament

Why is it that I write?
For people to read about my plight.

Posted on the internet,
All my thoughts, there to set.

Read by people I don't know,
Giving out pieces of my life, to show.

Others share for me to read,
To be part of their life, do I need?

I've got enough problems of my own,
Always good to know you don't suffer alone.

We also share the cheers and laughs,
The mistakes we make, the silly gaffs.

So on I'll write as I need,
And please leave a comment after you read. :-)

Regrets ?

I hate to say I have regrets,
But there are a few in my past.
If I could do it differently,
Would the changes last.

Those things that, if I could,
Go back to the time.
Would I bother, do I care,
Alter a word or a rhyme.

It's always hard to know how much,
The people in my life I miss.
Some are gone or no longer friends,
But remembered fondly the stolen kiss.

Do I wish I could go back,
To the days that I speak of.
I have to say I'm not so sure,
And would it still be love.

I try to move on,
Instead of regrets.
And live in the here and now,
I think that I am old enough to have paid my debts.

A bit of advice to my alter self,
To fondly remember the past.
Use it all, the love and loss.
To the future, a time not to surpass.

Hooked on The Real Housewives

Thought I was going to miss The Real Housewives of NYC, but then along came The Real Housewives of New Jersey. These woman are are like a pack, a gang a bunch of punks and I do not exaggerate. There are two sisters married to two brothers... and blood is thicker than water is on the family crest (if it isn't is should be) The third brother is married too, but not to a sister. This woman is from Las Vegas so has had to learn to adapt to the New Jersey way. There is another couple that is close friends to this group and then there is the divorcee who just doesn't fit in..she is only friends with the ex-Vegas wife. They all have children of varying ages and all have more money than they know what to do with. The accents of northern New Jersey Italian wives is hysterical, my parents come from northern Jersey and don't talk like these woman.

The two sisters are of course as thick as thieves and will defend each other to the death, nothing wrong with that except for a few lies and deceit. The other two wives fit in just fine, except the Vegas wife has the habit of bringing up the truth.. how silly she is and it gets her in trouble. Divorced wife is a train wreck, she has been married several times, no crime in that and been engaged 19 times... 19 can you imagine. She goes through a couple of young boyfriends in the series as well. Thing is this wife has a bit of a hidden past and the other wives find out about it and share it with each other and half the town. When divorced wife finds out the shit hits the fan. Again funny stuff, I wouldn't want all their money for their lives but it certainly makes for interesting viewing. I keep waiting for the laugh track.

Now of course I realize expert editing makes for a good show and there must be some boring parts where they are all getting along.. on the cutting room floor where they belong, but to suspend some reality (ha ha for a reality show) is great escapism for the real world of my own.

In the season finale, just aired, one of the "in" wives decides to have a dinner party in a restaurant and even though she hates divorced wife she invites her anyway. Everyone is sitting around having a laugh and "fun" when divorced wife brings up "the book". This book was where the others discovered her sorted path and she wants to set the record straight about the details of "the book". Apparently her ex-husband wrote the book and gives details of some of her exploits 20+ years ago, all of which aren't the truth according to divorced wife. Of course they have a nice civil discussion about "the book"........not and the yelling and name calling gets quite explosive. Some of the younger children are ushered out of the room some aren't. Hey why hide secrets from your preteen children.

It seems ok to me for the divorced woman to try and clear the air but this party was not the time or place for it. It gets completely out of control and the wife that hosts the party ends up tipping the tables over, china, food, cutlery and all. Quite a scene. The producers couldn't have asked for better tv. The husbands finally calm things down and they ALL go to the lounge next door and have a few drinks. If that was the only part you saw you wouldn't have believed they were clawing each others eyes out earlier.

Gawd I love this show.... can't wait for the reunion. It is so good they had to do it in two parts. DVR set...

PS.. I have lost almost 10 lbs now :-) (thought maybe posting the progress would keep me honest)

Insurance Salesmen Suck !!

We just had a meeting with a life insurance salesman to go over policies we bought we bought in 1988. Every five years or so someone from the company will call to see if we need any more insurance or if there is anything they can do for us. My answer is usually NO! This year for some reason I decided to see what was up with the policies so I arranged an appointment for him to meet us this evening when my husband got home from work. The salesman showed up on time and pulled out some papers and asked if we had questions. My husband asked about the death benefit value since we were part of a class action suit involved with this company and another insurance company. (the settlement allowed us to not make any payments on the plan but our understanding is the benefit would never change, it wouldn't go up but it wouldn't go down)

Anyway he was trying to explain to us, me in particular, how the plan was being paid over the last few years. He wasn't aware we were involved in the suit so wasn't able to explain how that affected the plan. He wasn't doing well at explaining things to me and as I said I didn't understand he just stared at me.... I didn't know what to say, if I did I would have understood what he was explaining in the first place. He says out of the blue, "I am not trying to be confrontational." What ??? I said, "I don't like being made to feel stupid," and got up and left the table. I didn't go back. I let the husband deal with him...and he can from now on.

Seems the salesman didn't even know what our original contract was, and hadn't bothered to look it up. My husband, who works in sales, seems to think it was his company's fault for not giving him enough information. My opinion is he should have looked through the file better and made sure he had all the pertinent information. If he knew the company had been involved in a class action suit why not look and see if we were part of it...etc.

When the next life insurance salesman calls to go over a policy I am going to be better prepared myself and maybe have a martini or two or three in my system.

Fooling around, mind reading and Star Trek

Yesterday my husband and I were alone at home for a few hours, which doesn't happen often, so I gave him some choices. We could fool around for a bit or maybe go to a movie. I have wanted to see Star Trek. Well... I enjoyed the movie. *sigh*

The husband managed to read my mind earlier in the day, amazingly so, and brought me a drink as I was wanting one. Some wonders never cease.

Back to Star Trek, I have to say I enjoyed it very much. It was fast paced, had great special effects and was even humorous. As a prequel it was well done, better than the Star Wars ones in my opinion.They were able to explain how the crew all got together and became the close unit they were on the original series. [yes I know it is just a movie ;-)] The actors chosen were good and were able to add their own nuances and still keep the ones from the original actors. The character that achieved this best was Bones. As soon as he was introduced I knew it was him.

I can't imagine seeing the movie in Imax since I jumped several times and even gasped out loud a few times. It was all good though and it just added to the excitement of the movie. Needless to say I recommend the movie and I won't give away any spoilers. Not that it will surprise anyone but it was funny watching Kirk run from some monster hoping he doesn't get killed and then realizing he can't... it is a prequel. But then there is that time change continuum thingy...

IVs and ipods

It is a Friday morning after a night of work and I am sitting in the outpatient infusion clinic waiting for my medicine. A few years ago it was discovered that I have Iron Deficient Anemia. The treatment, for me at least, is infusions of Venofer. "Venofer® (iron sucrose injection, USP) is a brown, sterile, aqueous complex of polynuclear iron (III)-hydroxide in sucrose for intravenous use." Source

I now go to the hemotologist every 3 or 4 months and have blood tests and talk to the doctor. She evaluates the levels and decides if I need more treatments or not. So far I seem to need them every 12 to 18 months. For some, one series of treatments is basically curative and for others they need them continually so I guess I fall in the middle which isn't too bad.

It doesn't take long since the volume is small and if I go right after work I am out by 9-ish and on my way home.
Needles don't bother me either so the whole process is quite simple. I have to add the nurses in these clinics are wonderful, skilled and compassionate.

The kids have asked what the medicine is like so I have included pictures to show them. It is a lovely brown liquid which looks like rust in a bag.



A very positive part of this whole "ordeal" is the new prospective it has given me on life. In the same clinic some people are getting chemotherapy. These patients come in with coolers of food and snacks, magazines and if they are lucky someone who can spend the day with them playing cards or just keeping them company. Chemo patients often spend the entire day getting all the medicines they need. Each person has their own "cubby" with a reclining chair a small table and a television. There is a curtain you can use to close off the area if you desire, so privacy is available. As I am having my treatments, and not fallen asleep, I have heard patients cry, talk softly and even get sick. It is sad to hear. Of course I have no idea why anyone is there as they don't know why I am there but today I was surprised to see so many young people. I have even encountered people I know and sadly one of them didn't survive her breast cancer... my point is it has made me decide to try and enjoy myself more. It is very evident that life is too short.

What do ipods have to do with any of this? Instead of watching tv I bring my ipod and listen to music and write. Music is very soothing for me and with the warmed blankets they have it can actually be an almost relaxing time. Almost... Between my ipod and BlackBerry I am not sure which I would be more lost without.

I also wanted to share this picture which shows a garden outside the oncology building. It isn't in it glory right now with the daffodils wilting and the pansy's just getting started but I think it is inspiring and creative.



And PS.. I have lost 5 pounds.. it has given me a bit of incentive to keep going. :-)

May in Boston Part 2, aka Rush and Martini do Boston

After our wonderful rest we got dressed for a night out. A drink in the room as we got ready and we headed to Quincy Marketplace. We had dinner reservations at Durgin Park and were lead right to our table.
Rush had steak tips and I had shepards pie. A couple of requisite martinis, appelitni for Rush and dinner was a success.

We wandered the marketplace after dinner and browsed through one of my favorite stores, Newbury Comics and bought a few goodies before looking for a night spot. Cheers seemed the place to be so we perched ourselves at the end of the bar and spent the night. (not literally of course). This isn't the original Cheers bar but an off shoot of the one the the tv show was based on. The original Cheers bar is actually called The Bull and Finch and is in a different location. No problem for us, as this one had a guitar player and a one armed singer. They were entertaining and played covers for all to sing along with.

As it was Friday night the place was lively and we talked to a lot of interesting people, men and woman. One man in particular was quite interesting and persistant...but sadly for him he went home empty handed, but Rush and I had plenty of laughs at his expense. Can't remember his name for the life of me. We closed the place down and since we had no desire to navigate the T that late or buzzed we opted for a taxi. Turns out the T was closed for the night anyway. We got back safely to the hotel and after drinking copious amounts of water we slept...and slept...well into the next morning. No bother, the shops don't open until 10 am.

We ordered breakfast in the room, for a whopping..not going tell how much, but it hit the spot and after filling up on eggs, coffee and soda we headed out for the day. Getting off at the Park Street station near the Boston Common we walked towards Fanueuil Hall stopping at some historical sites along the way.

The Grannery Graveyard is very interesting as it is the burial ground of Ben Franklin, Samuel Adams, John Hancock and Mother Goose to name a few. We next stopped at Kings Church and went inside for a look around. It is/was a church for the more well to do with family pews and a special seat for the govenor. There are also unknown soldiers buried under the entry way. We walked around the back of the church and found a nice garden. All these sites and more can be found easily by following the Freedom Trail that leads one through interesting and important historical sites of Boston.. and many are essential to the founding of America.

Once at Faneuil Hall we got some lunch. The inside hallway has dozens of small food stands that make it hard to choose what to have. I decided on a Philly cheese steak and Rush had a corn dog and cheese fries. We browsed more shops, had our picture taken with Ben Franklin and eventually headed "home".

On the way back to the hotel we stopped at the Trinity Church for Rush. It is a beautiful church and I still get a thrill out of the new contrasted with the old. I think Boston has learned to blend them well. We got ice cream and walked the rest of the way back to the hotel. My knee you ask? I did fine, I refused to let it slow me down. Sure we rested from time to time but what was the hurry. That was the best part of the weekend, no time table just what we wanted to do.

As we walked, we passed some interesting restaurants and decided we would hang out in one of them that evening after dinner, which we had in our room. (we stopped at a Stop and Shop to pick up some food. I love the city but how one grocery shops escapes me. I like to fill my car with $300 in food and drive it home. How do you do that in the city?)

We ate, had a few drinks, checked our favorite websites and as we sat around we got lazy and both of us fell asleep and missed a night out.. I know sad isn't it, but as I said it was nice to relax, chat and have no responsibilities.

Up earlier the next day, we headed to Newbury Street (Boston's Rodeo Drive) and did mostly window shopping. I had to stop at Newbury Comics as it is the original one, I bought Russell Brand's dvd and some games for the daughters. Some interesting shops for a proper shopping area (check out the sign for the store under Newbury Comics) Many of stores weren't open yet so we walked to the Public Gardens to find the "Make way for Ducklings" statue made famous in the book of the same name by Robert McCloskey Not sure which came first, the book or the statue but they are "famous" in Boston, with someone always trying to steal one of the ducklings.

After finding them we sat and watched the Boston Swan boats
and people, both very interesting. It was a beautiful day and we headed back to Newbury Street for more window shopping and lunch. We found a small restaurant and decided to sit inside in the air conditioning which turned out to be a good idea since it started to rain. All the outside patrons rushed in and we relaxed waiting for the rain to stop. It didn't as quickly as we wanted and we ventured out in it anyway, hiding under awnings when necessary. It was soon time to head back to the hotel and say our goodbyes and get to the airport. We also found out that the hotel had a nice little hidden lounge and had a couple martinis before we called the cab for the airport.

My family picked me up at the airport, the kids got to meet Rush again and the husband got to meet her as well. It was then goodbye for real and sadly we said our farewells and went back to RL (real life). Love you Rush and had a great time... can't wait to come out to Indianapolis for a view of your life.

May in Boston Part 1,
aka Rush and Martini do Boston

Relief

I sit in the back of the bus and cry,
Watching as my life goes by.

The cars go past at breakneck speed,
Tempting me to take the lead.

Wishing I could be brave and try,
To say to my sadness a final good bye.

My gears in reverse so it seems,
Erasing everything, even my dreams.

When I live my life as I want,
People get hurt, my mind they haunt.

I know I can't be what everyone wants,
So continue I will and ignore the taunts.

It starts as sadness and as grief,
Ends in my mind starting to feel some relief.

Hiding

What is the point of even trying,
All it causes is more pain and crying.

The days go buy and nothing changes,
The same old shit, same old strangers.

The rhyme is a stretch but so it goes,
Sometimes life sucks as does the prose.

Each day brings a different grief,
Steals the soul like a silent thief.

Sunshine fades into the clouds,
I hide myself amongst the crowds.

People looking, people staring,
Hide me from the world uncaring.

It does not happen every day,
But when it does, the feelings stay.

Eventually returning to the light,
The next day brings hope and a new sight.

May in Boston Part 1, aka Rush and Martini do Boston

There is nothing better than Boston in the spring. I spent Memorial Day weekend there with my two daughters and a friend visiting Boston for the first time from Indiana. My daughters and I drove into the city on Thursday afternoon and checked into the hotel in the Back Bay. It was pleasant hotel and a nice room.
I was exhausted from working the night before so I rested and we ordered room service. The kids raved over the pizza and sliders, for dessert we shared a slice of cheese cake. The girls played with their cameras and I slept a little. When the time came to go to the concert we got a cab and headed to Bank of America Pavilion. We got our will call tickets and headed in. The first group The Helio Sequence was just finishing up so regrettably we missed them. Next up was Mat Kearney which I was excited to see.He was entertaining and I was thrilled to see him. He seemed to have a fair following in the audience. Between his set and Keane he signed autographs.


Keane did not disappoint at all, they played all our favorites and some from the new cd as well. They don't go for too much flash on the stage which is nice, it is about the music. The big difference this time is they had a new member of the band playing guitar. They haven't had one on previous tours. Tom Chaplin, the lead singer, even played electric and acoustic guitar several times.

They played an encore and were done. They praised the crowd and Boston, but suppose they and all other artists do that at most of their shows. We headed out and it took us what seemed forever to find a cab home. We "stole" from the front of some hotel.
At the room we snacked on leftover pizza and slept well.

The next morning I was up early to meet a friend at Logan Airport. I left the girls sleeping and headed off to the T (Boston's subway system). I got to the airport in record time it seems and had plenty of time to kill. The part of the terminal I was in didn't have much to occupy me, but I did find a Starbucks and a magazine store and waited. Rush's plane landed early and we were soon headed back to the hotel. Rush had never been on a subway before do it was fun to share the new experience with her. I find the T a bit confusing but after many trips to Boston I am finally getting the "hang" of it.

At the hotel my daughters were awake and ready to go out for the day. They had ordered bagels and were anxious to get started. Rush checked into her room, we moved our things to hers and checked out. We started the day by heading to the Bunker Hill monument. It was a bit of a walk after the subway ride but it was a beautiful day and the part of town in lovely. After looking around we headed down the hill to the USS Constitution. It wasn't in its fullest glory as it is being renovated but the inside was open and the officers really knew their facts.

We headed back to Boston via the harbor and had a nice boat ride. We had lunch at Legal Seafood (yum) and then took the T back to the hotel. We said our goodbyes to my daughters and Rush and I laid down for a rest. The night life was yet to come.

Stay tuned for part 2 :-D